Once upon a time, there was a cute little puffball thing named Kirby. Kirby lived in a place called Dream Land, on a planet called Pop Star. He spent most of his days frolicking with his friends Waddle Dee, Meta Knight, Rick the hamster, Nago the kitty, Kine the fish, a little boy, a blue thing that had an ass-licking fetish, a pink thing with a bow on its head and some bird faggots. Kirby's favorite thing of all, however, was food. If Kirby did not have his food, he would go on a rampage, devouring everyone and everything in sight until he got it back.

One day, a large duck thing named Dedede gave in to his desire to break into Kirby's house and steal a piece of that delicious-looking strawberry shortcake of Kirby's that he'd been coveting. He figured that a single piece wouldn't be missed, and was about to snatch one off Kirby's table. Unfortunately for Dedede, it turned out that Kirby was already home, and Dedede was caught before he could take a bite. Kirby got really pissed off and bashed Dedede's head in with a large mallet. "The cake is a lie...................." said Dedede, and then everyone on Pop Star laughed because it was funny. "That's so random!" said the sun. "You so cray, Dedede" said the moon. Then Kirby murdered them both with his hammer. He killed the sun and the moon. Shit just got real.

Kirby rampaged all over Dream Land and brutally raped everyone that got in his way. He ran into the little boy that he hung out with sometimes and the boy was like "I'm an artist!" and then Kirby Down+A'd him because he hates people who self-proclaim. The little boy keeled over and was like "OH MY BALLS" while grabbing his crotch. Kirby floated above the boy, turned into a rock and crushed him. He was now more pissed off than he'd ever been before.

Later, he came across that one African American boss from Kirby Superstar, along with Jynx and Mr. Popo for some reason and he just ate them all in one giant gulp, which in turn gave him giant Niggerlips.

He continued on his way and eventually arrived at an ocean, where he began to devour small fish with goggles underwater. Then, a shark picked a fight with him. The shark started barfing skulls and anchors and then rocks started falling. Kirby used his Niggerlips power to blow the skulls and rocks right at the shark. The shark was about to die and was like "Dat's boosheet. WHERE MY BITCHZ AT?". Suddenly, all these female sharks came and barfed a million skulls and anchors, too many for Kirby's Niggerlips to handle. He managed to get the fuck out of that ocean before they killed him, thankfully. Kirby decided that he now hated women because shark women were too much for him. Back in the ocean, one of the younger sharks was like "I hate barfing " and then turned into Princess Peach. She was immediately kidnapped by Bowser and brought back to the Mushroom Kingdom. In a black man's voice, Kirby was like "oh no you don't nigga" and then he grabbed a warp star to give chase to Bowser. Then, he magically turned into a very pissed-off Mario.

Upon his arrival in Mushroom Kingdom, Mario walked half-heartedly through world 1-1 and then took a break to sit on some floating blocks. He contemplated why he had ever gone after Bowser in the first place. For Princess Peach, a woman? He'd only followed his instinct. "Women are all the same. They're all just like sharks," he thought. "And Princess Peach is a shark too. What's the point of a game about saving a princess if I hate women? I should have turned into some guy from Team Fortress 2 or some shit so my purpose can just be to kill people, not to save a woman." Then he turned into a black turd and got really contemplative and like deep and shit and he flew around in space while pooping rainbows and playing ping pong. "I AM ONLY A MAN..." he declared, then came back down to the Mushroom Kingdom and turned back into Mario. "I am no more special than any other man" and then he pulled a pistol from the depths of his ass and aimed it toward his head. BOOM!

When he opened his eyes, he was a nignog in a white suit, standing on the roof of a hotel. "Sheet. I forgot that I'm so badass that my gun only works when I aim it at other people." He hesitated for a moment and tried to make sense of what had just happened, and suddenly it all came back to him. All the innocent living creatures on Pop Star that he'd slain. He couldn't believe what he'd done.
"No...no, it wasn't me, it can't be. It's all some kind of a misunderstanding!" He noticed a suitcase on the floor in front of him. No one else was around, so it must've been his. He opened it and found a pair of Niggerlips inside. "Oh," he cried in disbelief.

Kirby woke up in his little house in Dream Land. It had all just been a dream! He bounced out of bed and to his delight, his strawberry shortcake was sitting safe and sound on his table. He saw Dedede lurking outside and decided to offer him a piece. Dedede was delighted. Then Princess Peach was there and was like "<3" so Kirby offered her a piece too. They all sat down together to eat. "What a moist and fluffy cake!" exclaimed Dedede. "Sweet!" said Peach. Kirby inhaled the cake, minus two pieces, sighed in happiness and joyfully basked in the light of the sun he didn't kill. The blue butt-licking thing and Waddle Dee and the kitty all noticed and Kirby felt bad because he'd eaten all the rest of the cake already. Thankfully, he remembered that his fridge was stuffed with all kinds of great food, so he brought a basket full of it outside and laid it all out on a picnic blanket. He and his friends would all have a picnic today! Now that there were no more nightmares in his Dream Land, he could go on just enjoying the little things in life, like that day with all the yummy food and the sun and his friends. Yay. The end. :3